Speaking to the Busyness

Can you believe we are 10 weeks into 2020!?

I hate to say it, but I think 2020 is going to be one of those years that could get away from us if we don’t take it by the horns, make intentional decisions, put an action plan in place, and go for it. Imagine what we could do if we felt as though we could do anything?!

I heard years ago that it takes 21 days to form a new habit, but Google says, ‘it takes an average of 66 days’. If Google is right, this means we really have to get a move on so that we can make some significant long lasting changes sooner rather than later.

I personally wear many hats in my life. I am a happy wife, and a happy mum to four precious kids – 3 beautiful and very determined adolescent women and a fantastic mini man who dreams of doing amazing things in his life.

I also identify as Head chef, Uber driver, Driving instructor, Household manager, Events co-ordinator, Finance manager and budgeting expert (bill payer), Travel agent, Teacher, Head purchasing officer for all things relating to household, members of the family, extended family, and friends, Boxing ring adjudicator and referee, Life coach, Investigator, Researcher, Psychologist, Health advocate, Spiritual Advisor, Daughter, Aunt, Sister, Friend, Writer, Life student, Self-care advocate, and Tired woman.

I, like many other women in the world feel a little overwhelmed at times by the enormity of what motherhood actually looks like in our day. The internet was created to help us in so many ways, and it does, but we are far busier now than what it was like for previous generations of mothers.

This is why it’s time we tell the busyness in our lives to shush. I hate feeling as though I am carrying the world on my shoulders, it’s noisy, and all I want is the white noise to hush so that I can hear myself think. It doesn’t mean the chaos will stop, or that I’ll be able to take off any of my hats, especially not with 4 kids, but I do have the choice in which I go about my day.

I choose JOY!

I choose Relationships and messy family life, and quality friends. Our motto is Family and friends before housework! The people in our lives are far more important than whether or not we hung out or brought in and folded our washing. Family consists of those who are biologically related to us and those special people in our lives we call friends. Doing life with people we love is a wonderful experience, and my heart is so full. I feel so blessed to be doing life with my tribe.

I love being around the people in my life that love me for me. I also love being that for my family and friends. It is so refreshing to be around my people. Love goes both ways. Vulnerability in relationships brings safety and connectedness that I can only explain as long term and wonderful. It’s okay to voice concerns and discuss different views or perspectives relating to life matters when you know and feel safe in your tribe. Past hurts from previous toxic relationships dissipate into oblivion when you are with your people. Good friends love you for where you are at, but also help grow you into the best version of yourself. They don’t give up on you when times are tough, they walk beside you and cheer you on.

Family life is busy for every mum. I don’t believe I know a mum who feels on top of every area of their lives. Women have a lot on our plates, and Rome was not built in a day! Things get done when they get done most of the time, but everything is assessed not by what should be done next, but by what item or issue is screeching the loudest.

I have discovered that it is impossible to get everything on my list done in a day. I choose what I prioritise now, and game plan for all those things that I can’t get done in the same day. I am learning to flexi schedule (some things are absolute, but there are many things that can be done when I get to them). Most days I juggle things around according to their screeching. The loudest screech still gets the attention first, but I am working on that.

So, in Sandy Forsters book “How to be Wildly Wealthy Fast”, she recommends women to write down what they want their daily lives to look like. So, I have decided to write down what I want my daily life to look like.

Heres a first look at what I have been thinking about.

1. I would like to wake up and go for a walk on the beach, or a swim depending on how game I feel.

2. I would like to spend 1/2 an hour every morning reading the bible and pondering what I’ve read.

3. I would like to come home set the kids work for the day, and then leave them too it while I a few things around the house done, obviously checking in with the kids to make sure they are on the right path.

4. I would like to spend an hour at least every day writing.

5. I would like to meal plan monthly so I will always know what we are having for dinner. My most disliked question in our household is ‘what’s for dinner?’. I know everyone in our family wants to know, I’m asked often during the day, but not knowing or having a plan causes me stress. Ingredients will be put on my phone so that I don’t lose the paper list. I have a habit of leaving lists on the table, or it dies a terrible death in my handbag somewhere between leaving the house and getting to the shops.

6. I would like to read every day without question.

I’m sure that there are a number of other things I would like to write down but at this moment, this is a good start.

So here we are, at the end of February, thinking about all the wonderful things that are about to come our way in March. Let’s be reminded as this month ends, and a new one starts that each day is like page in a book. I would like mine to read, that I lived well, and loved much. The pages are filled with examples of our family living well and loving others to the best of our ability.

Catch you next time,

Xo